 8/25/2006 | home again, again. drama time! I ended up skipping the thing on Wednesday night! Ha, I'm lame, I know, but it sounded lame anyways. I skipped dinner, too! and hermited it up in my room. It was so relaxing. I ended up going to bed early (10:30PM! it's early for me, I usually fall asleep around 1AM) Thursday turned out to be not so bad :) Actually, really fun! My functional group (13 of us) had a party in our manager's suite. Everyone in our group is young (21-26?) and our manager has kids our age, so it's an interesting dynamic. Then we went to someone's room and drank, went to someone else's room and drank, went to my room and drank, left the booze there, and went to the bar to sing kareoke (periodically going up to my room to refill on cheap booze). Do you see the theme?? See??? I can have fun, after all, and be social! It's just getting out there that bothers me. I don't like to go "socialize" with people. I have so much trouble getting motivated to go. But when I'm there, after the initial awkwardness, I'm usually fine and have fun. Well, I think I got Mat pissed off at me. Before we went to the bar, I talked to him briefly on the phone and said that we were going to the bar to do kareoke. Later in the evening I came back up with one of my group members. While I was in the bathroom, he answered my phone, which I think pissed him off. I talked to Mat, he seemed ok, then went back down. When I came back up after the bar closed, I had 4 missed calls. very annoying. I think he may be jealous?? Sometimes he gets paranoid that I will cheat on him. He sometimes makes inappropriate cracks about this that are not funny. This annoys me to no end, and actually sometimes make me wish I could!! Does he want me to cheat on him?? It's like he's trying making this an issue when it's not. It's annoying. And honestly, it makes me wish that I could at least try the single life again (which in turn makes me feel scummy. i'm such an asshole. the conference was filled with 500 people with good jobs and who had been extensively background-checked. more than half were male. it is heaven for single people.) This is why I fight with him! ha. In one of my classes, we did something about personalities (instead of the standard Myers-Briggs, it was based around four character types: Analyzer, Stabalizer, Controller, Persuader). We were supposed to analyze a co-worker we had trouble communicating with, but I analyzed Mat instead. It seems like we are too similar! He definitely has a stabalizer personality, and so do I - at work. But when I'm with him, I feel like I'm much more agressive because I get annoyed with him being so passive. Is it that I dislike(in him) the things I dislike about myself? Who knows. I'm over it now. So is he (I think!) He asked me how I would feel if a girl answered my phone. Honestly, I probably wouldn't care that much (which makes me wonder... should I care more??? I'm not really a jealous person that way). I don' t think he would cheat on me. And, being 100% honest, if he did then I would at least know that we weren't meant to be (it would be upsetting, but in a way, a relief that I wouldn't have to make up my mind. I sometimes feel like he likes me more than I like him. Or he is more sure of it, anyways). But he knew I was hanging out with people ahead of time, he could hear them in the background. *sigh* // posted by Sasha @ 8/25/2006 10:35:00 PM 
Comments: 21-26, that's really lucky!!! Glad you got to enjoy some time during this thing. Sounds like he gets jealous and you don't. I dunno, there's a difference between 1 being jealous and one just not trusting the other person. I wonder which it is? I used to be very possessive of Mike in college and make smart remarks about certain girls I didn't trust. I grew out of that and after a while Mike said he "missed" it. I guess what I'm saying is, jealousy can be fixed, it's trust that's harder (not that you didn't already know that.) ;) # posted by  : 8/26/2006 4:21 PM
This comment has been removed by the author. # posted by  Unknown : 5/22/2011 8:32 AM
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 Currently "workin' for the man," getting my Master's, and attempting to lead a happy life. Dating Matteo (going on 4 years)! Trying to figure out my life as I am coming of age and becoming an adult. I like... the unexpected. I like outdoor sports like cycling, hiking, canoeing, and rock climbing. I do yoga. I'm a vegetarian (10+ years). I love computers & webdesign... I'm a web developer at the moment ^_^ I love to read, ask me for recommendations! I'm an "artiste," I love to draw and paint (portraits are my favorite). Like to knit, cook, etc. I love traveling. I'm friendly, I swear! Email: lovesasha_AT_inbox.com AIM: LovePeaceSasha my "official" profile RECENT POSTS
ARCHIVES LAYOUT INFO The picture featured in my layout is drawn by the artist Toko Ohmori. 
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